Use swingers sites to your sexy advantage!
Adult dating sites are a great way for naughty couples to meet other like-minded people for fun. However, it’s easy to assume that meeting people would be easier online (like shopping and banking) but a good amount of time and effort is still required to make sure you meet the right couples for you.
So how do we make the most of technology to enhance our swinging lifestyle?
Decide what you want and who you want
A lot of people seem to join swingers sites with no real game plan. Yes, they want to meet other swingers but they only have a loose idea of how to go about it. There’s nothing wrong with ‘winging it’ as long as you’re prepared for things not working out well. To avoid disappointment however, take that time when filling out your online profile to think about who you want to meet and what you want to achieve.
If you’re completely new to swinging, consider whether you should meet a similarly new couple where you can all learn together at a relaxed pace, or if you want to be guided by a more experienced couple who won’t leave you guessing. It’s best to be honest about your inexperience. Needless to say, make sure you’re both equally committed to swinging. If either one or both of you are unsure about entering the lifestyle, take a step back.
It’s also a good idea to decide if you want your first swingers date to be purely social or entirely sinful. You shouldn’t come across as super horny and ‘ready for action ASAP’ on your profile if you want to go slow on the first date. If you don’t want to play on the first date, then make that clear on your profile or when corresponding with a couple online. Similarly, if you only want a night of pure sexual indulgence, don’t approach couples who are unsure about playing. In short, don’t write ‘open for anything’ if you’re really not.
Rediscover phone skills!
There’s nothing wrong with corresponding online, but if you’re serious about meeting someone, get ready to pick up the phone. Email, Skype, and even swingers sites’ messaging system are great for breaking the ice and getting to know couples you’ve met from an adult dating site, but it’s often too easy to collect online contacts and never actually end up meeting in real life.
If you feel most comfortable using things like KIK to ‘kick’ things off, then make some simple rules. Once you’ve added a new contact, initiate a chat reasonably immediately. Use online means to swap photos and exchange small talk before getting to the main point which is discussing what both parties want. It may be tempting (especially for newbies) to engage in sexy talk or webcam sex, but try to avoid it unless you’re all content to dabble in that first before meeting.
If you all agree that meeting in person is best, then exchange telephone numbers and dial. If you are concerned about sharing phone numbers, consider getting a ‘play’ phone or use an anonymous Skype account for voice calls. Have a good old fashioned chat on the phone and pencil in a first date. Any more online contact should just be for confirming date plans.
Unless people are legitimately occupied, a willingness to talk on the phone is a fairly good indication of how genuine a couple is. If you aren’t similarly willing to speak to a couple on the phone, consider whether you are ready to meet people. Phone calls are also the best way to verify that a willing female partner exists on both sides. If you only chat online to a ‘couple’ via Skype and discover weeks later that you’ve been catfished, you really only have yourselves to blame.
Use your swingers sites’ features to find the right people
Those stung by having their time wasted by pretenders and wannabe swingers should look at whether their chosen swingers sites have the right features. Swingers dating needn’t be a frustrating experience if you can target the right audience.
Swingers sites such as RedHotPie and Kasidie have verification processes so you get an idea of who has taken the time to prove how committed they are to meeting people. Verifying (or certifying) usually involves taking a specific photo of yourself (which won’t be viewed by anyone other than the webmasters) and then getting a tick of approval on your profile. If you focus your attention on verified people, you’ll save time avoiding catfish, but naturally you should verify your own profile too.
Also, get to know your swingers sites’ search functionality. Browsing aimlessly is fun but you might get distracted by the hot photos of couples on profiles and not notice things like sexual orientation and other important criteria that may or may not make you a swinging match in heaven.
Overall, swingers sites are meant to help you have fun. The best swingers sites should have features to help you have fun faster so take a good look around before firing messages randomly at profiles with the naughtiest photos.
Also, check out this great article from Australian swingers resource site, Swingers Australia for more tips on getting the most out of swingers sites.